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"Wit beyond measure is man's greatest treasure."
Tuesday, March 30, 2004
This is one of the most out-of-your-business article I have ever read in my entire life.
The next Mrs. Tom Cruise:
Who's the perfect match for the newly available superstar?
Daily News
Tom Cruise is back on the market at the age of 41. The suddenly available Cruise is certainly a great catch. Handsome, rich, famous (even though at 5-feet-7, he is a bit vertically challenged).
-------------------
Lisa Marie Presley, 36
Like Cruise, Lisa Marie has had failed marriages, but the biggest thing in her favor is she wouldn't tower over him like ex-wife Nicole. She's only 5-feet-2!
Con: Her marriage to Michael Jackson.
Jennifer Lopez, 33
Don't look now, it's Tom-ifer cruising down the red carpet!
The 5-foot-6 star is a Latin lovely like Penelope Cruz, and, like Tom, she's also had two failed marriages.
Con: The notorious diva expects to be treated like a queen.
Halle Berry, 37
The 5-foot-7 "Catwoman" beauty kicked two cheating ex-husbands to the curb, and is looking for a faithful man whose fame can hold a candle to hers.
Con: Men cheat on her - there must be trouble in this paradise.
Nicole Kidman, 36
Though she's taller than Tom (5-foot-10), Nicole has practice slumping to give him height - and she's used to skipping the high heels.
Con: Her lack of commitment to Scientology - and red-hot career, which has begun to eclipse his.
Uma Thurman, 33
Although the 6-foot-tall Buddhist beauty is five inches taller than Cruise, he was not put off by the height difference when he first fell for 5-foot-10 Kidman.
Con: She's still getting over the split with straying Ethan Hawke - and smooching hotelier Andre Balazs.
Angelina Jolie, 28
He has two kids of different races with Kidman, while the 5-foot-8 "Taking Lives" star has a year-old Cambodian son (Maddox), and plans to adopt again soon from a Third World country.
Con: Getting together in the same place at the same time.
And if he dares...
Courtney Love, 39: Scientology could help with her drug and alcohol problems, and he'd be a good father image for her daughter, Frances.
Paris Hilton, 23: She loves flashbulbs in her face, and they would be nonstop if she dated Cruise, even though he's closer to her dad's age.
Britney Spears, 22: She likes to have high-profile romances that break up in the public eye, and she's willing to get out of a bad marriage very quickly.
Help Tom
Which celebrity single gal do you think would make the perfect match for Tom Cruise? Sorry, ladies, you can't nominate yourself. Send your thoughts to: opinion@edit.nydailynews.com
The next Mrs. Tom Cruise:
Who's the perfect match for the newly available superstar?
Daily News
Tom Cruise is back on the market at the age of 41. The suddenly available Cruise is certainly a great catch. Handsome, rich, famous (even though at 5-feet-7, he is a bit vertically challenged).
-------------------
Lisa Marie Presley, 36
Like Cruise, Lisa Marie has had failed marriages, but the biggest thing in her favor is she wouldn't tower over him like ex-wife Nicole. She's only 5-feet-2!
Con: Her marriage to Michael Jackson.
Jennifer Lopez, 33
Don't look now, it's Tom-ifer cruising down the red carpet!
The 5-foot-6 star is a Latin lovely like Penelope Cruz, and, like Tom, she's also had two failed marriages.
Con: The notorious diva expects to be treated like a queen.
Halle Berry, 37
The 5-foot-7 "Catwoman" beauty kicked two cheating ex-husbands to the curb, and is looking for a faithful man whose fame can hold a candle to hers.
Con: Men cheat on her - there must be trouble in this paradise.
Nicole Kidman, 36
Though she's taller than Tom (5-foot-10), Nicole has practice slumping to give him height - and she's used to skipping the high heels.
Con: Her lack of commitment to Scientology - and red-hot career, which has begun to eclipse his.
Uma Thurman, 33
Although the 6-foot-tall Buddhist beauty is five inches taller than Cruise, he was not put off by the height difference when he first fell for 5-foot-10 Kidman.
Con: She's still getting over the split with straying Ethan Hawke - and smooching hotelier Andre Balazs.
Angelina Jolie, 28
He has two kids of different races with Kidman, while the 5-foot-8 "Taking Lives" star has a year-old Cambodian son (Maddox), and plans to adopt again soon from a Third World country.
Con: Getting together in the same place at the same time.
And if he dares...
Courtney Love, 39: Scientology could help with her drug and alcohol problems, and he'd be a good father image for her daughter, Frances.
Paris Hilton, 23: She loves flashbulbs in her face, and they would be nonstop if she dated Cruise, even though he's closer to her dad's age.
Britney Spears, 22: She likes to have high-profile romances that break up in the public eye, and she's willing to get out of a bad marriage very quickly.
Help Tom
Which celebrity single gal do you think would make the perfect match for Tom Cruise? Sorry, ladies, you can't nominate yourself. Send your thoughts to: opinion@edit.nydailynews.com
